“Candy, tastes like chicken, if chicken was a candy.” —Toki Wartooth (via aclockworkalexis)
“I woke up…with a clown’s hand in my pants…that’s what I did today” —William Murderface-Metalocalypse (via powermetalprincess)
“I’m sorry about being a dick, but sometimes it’s hard to suppress the urge of ruining other peoples lives.” —(via 6f7foot)
“We have liberated your island from you, your island that was once a nucular, nuclear testing facility that has in turn tragically disfigured you all into ugly horrible-looking mutants. And we now decree your island the Dethklok Home for Wayward Kitties. RELEASE… THE KITTIES!” —Nathan Explosion (via powermetalprincess)
Bleach is healthy. It's mostly water, and we're mostly water, therefore we are bleach.