“I’m sorry about being a dick but sometimes it’s hard to suppress the urge of ruining other peoples lives.” — William Murderface (via a-farewell-to-arms)
“Sobers peoples are peoples too!” —Toki Wartooth (via followingthereaper)
- Pickles: Hey do we got any songs with destiny in the title?
- Nathan: Uhhh no, but I can just stick it in there, nobody understands what I'm saying anyway.
Why Metalocalypse is one of the best shows, and Toki's the best character.
- Nathan: I just don't want some guy with no reason to live fuck with my mouth, you know what I mean?
- Toki: Why can'ts it be a ladies boobs whats cleans your teeth?
- [pause, then Murderface and Nathan start chuckling]
- Murderface: You know, usually...
- Nathan: Usually you have really bad ideas, but that-
- Murderface: That's a billion-dollar idea.
- Nathan: Cleaning your teeth with tits!
There's only one thing left to do.
Right pickles? ... I SAID RIGHT PICKLES?!
This ams dildoes!!
I love how he calls everything dildos.
- Skwisgaar: What in da fuckin' names of Oden?
- Toki: What the hell was zat?
- Skwisgaar: Dude, wherez are we'z, what da fucks we'z just flyz in?...What ze hell waz wrongz with your guitar soundz tonight?
- Toki: What ze hell is zat supposed to mean it sounded great.
- Skwisgaar: Nope. Soundz dildoz. Againz.
“I could never lose the weight after you were born! And look at the veins in my bosom, they’re like a roadmap of Stockholm!” —Serveta Skwigelf (via planetpisss)
YOUR BLOG. LET ME HAVE SEX WITH IT.
I’m not sure that’s physically possible, but feel free to try.